Here with you, skinny legs and all

I am typing on the world’s softest keyboard. It’s like having jello fingertips.

I was reading “Skinny Legs and All” again last night. It is such a good book.

I like its definition of art as something that you can see in your head, but you know doesn’t exist in reality, so you try to make it exist.

I think this is what Robert Bateman cannot understand.

Art as imitation? That is just flattery.

Painted fangs and paper coats, a canvas of timeless snow. To make beauty and life something to look at.

I disagree with it all.

Make randomness. Find splendour in it.

Paint the pattern of your mind in the fickle sand, and know that it will blow away.

To be or not to be timeless? Infinite? Or just human?

We err, we die, we hold stiff poses against the sky – a sky that never changes.  And what we make and what we shape is beautiful because it eventually ceases to obey the order we have inflicted upon it and metamorphs into something we could not ever have imagined.

And I ask myself, over and over again: where would I be if I had never met you?

A tan, bland comment from a waiter at a tea party. And I would have outlasted the winter with my ice and arctic breath.

But you and I – our pulse, our heart, together: we are not meant for trivia and sullen conversation.

The outside rules are writing themselves in rigid lines of decline, delineating the passive guests – but we, we are undressed and dressed again, an unfolding nebula of muscle, blood, and mirth, and who dares to say us wrong.

Who dares to say but sorry and thank you – these well-wishers and critics.

I see you and I’m dazed understanding. I’m iron on fire.

I’m living, I’m burning; I have stunned the artifex of my life in the shower, and these eyes – mine eyes are dancing the jive with yours.

And I’ll be here.
(kissing your eyelids shut at night).

For extra credit:

O, my love.

I only wanna be your one life stand

Warning: excessive use of hyperbole ahead.

Also, falling rocks.

(Just kidding.)

THIS PAST SATURDAY I WENT TO THE BEST CONCERT OF MY LIFE.

And yet I feel tongue-tied trying to communicate how absolutely earth-shatteringly awesome this experience truly was.

As such, everything inside of me is screaming USE YOUR SWEARS USE THEM ALL USE ALL THE SWEARS.

But I won’t.

So it’s hard.

But the question remains – how do I get you, dear reader, to feel that same exhilaration I felt stepping into that club?

How to make you feel that same energy, coursing the length of my body?

Tingling the ends of your fingertips? The dips of your earlobes?

Tickling the backs of your knees, slipping down into the folds of your shoes?

To hear the murmur of the crowd, a beehive of anticipation?

A vibration.

How do I make you crackle and snap with the electricity of it all, the flash of the lights, and the intensely, indescribably, intoxicating sounds careening off of the stage, permeating every last crook and cranny of the sweat-slicked, pulsating room?

How do I make you dance until your blistered, blisters cry nay command you not to stop, never stop, your mouth a perma-grin, a high school smirk stained with salty secrets, and the knowledge that all of this is so good, and all of this will never be so good.

So if I cannot do this, I will just say – GO TO HOT CHIP.

Go.

Elsewhere in the cosmic kitchen:

Zen.

Brunch.

Weirdo.

Cat.

View.

Tell me where you’ve been to
Nowhere that you shouldn’t do
Tell me what you’re good for
I can tell you something too.

We get those tongues wagging

Here are two conversations M and I had this weekend:

(P.S. I am still laughing)

[Scene One: Earls restaurant, patio. Saturday night, drinks and date night]

Me: You are a very good looking man.

M: [unintelligible gibberish]

Me: [laughing]

M/Me: [both continue laughing/trying to make each other laugh by making crazy faces]

Me: I’m trying to figure out what race you would belong to in Lord of the Rings. I used to always go with human – you’re a good shoe-in for Aragorn. But you also have quite a bit of hobbit in you. And elf. And dwarf.

M: What about orc?

Me. Yes, definitely orc. And uruk-hai.

M: Goblin?

Me: [thinking] Nah. Never goblin.

M: [nodding, playing with his wedding ring. Then, thinking to himself] Preeeeecccciiiooouussss….

Me: Oh goodness, of course. I have no idea how I didn’t think of that. You definitely, definitely have some Gollum in you too.

M: Hmmm…

[pause]

Me: [pretending to be all nonchalant] So, um, what race do you think I belong to?

M: [not taking a beat] Sauron.

Me: Hahahahahahahahahaha…ohhhh noooooo….

M: Not what you were looking for?

Me: You know I wanted you to say elf.

M: I know.

Me: I KNOW I’M LITHE AND BEAUTIFUL.

M/Me: [continuous laughing]

END SCENE.

[Scene Two: Driving home from restaurant. I cannot stop taking photos of the sky – the sky which I have been yammering on about all day long.]

Me: [taking a photo] ZOMG THE SKY IS SO BEAUTIFUL.

M: I know.

Me: The sun is SO huge, and the way the clouds are clustered that way is just magical. It seriously looks like the gateway to heaven.

M: It does look like heaven.

Me: I know I’ve been talking about it all day, but I honestly can’t get over how amazingly phenomenal this is. It literally takes my breath away. Even just looking at it is making me choke up…I really feel like I’m going to cry.

M: I have a feeling your period may be on its way.

Me: Hahahahahahahahahaha. [pause] That’s true.

Hope you all had a great weekend!

Now open your eyes

Things are happening.

I can feel it in the crackle of the early autumn air.

Just breathe:

He lay upon the red clay, and the world shook to swallow him. Under his father’s sodden cloak, eyes closed, he heard nothing, saw nothing. All was sensation, cool knuckles of the thick riverbed gripping his back and arms; he sank a little more before the tremors stopped.

He waited for the cloak to be husked off, ripped from his body. They would find him, soon. He lay yards from cover under this pathetic shroud; they were toying with him. His weeping eyes stared open expecting the clouded night sky, and the coppery anticipation of death coated his own tongue – made his breath stink like the earth.

The silence was all.

He waited for strangers.

His breaths grew shallow under the thick material, slowed with the cold of it and he remembered reaching that point finally, where the immensity of fear was devoured by a monstrous finality, a sense of end, and he decided to die.

The small arm that pulled clear of the muck was stiff and unfamiliar, as if another boy hid there with him, was betraying him.

Then the cloak fell aside, and all was a screaming panorama of the looming forest and the angry darkness, and a total emptiness – their absence. His sniveling helplessness spurred to quicken his blood; he saw himself as if from the edge of the trees, a shaking unreality.

And that was all, his earliest memory.

And see:
Sunset.
Bridge.
Mural.
Food.
Cat.
Love. (And one of my favourites of the summer.)
Happy Wednesday to you all.

Who’s the boss?

Do you ever get the urge to just shout at the top of your lungs, “AIN’T LIFE GRAND?”

Sometimes I get so giddy I feel like I am about to explode.

There are times when I feel so overwhelmed by the magic and love that is my life that I’m practically moved to tears. Seriously, I’ll be sitting on the chesterfield next to Mr. M and all of a sudden – BAM! I’m choking out words (nay – garbled syllables) in an effort to communicate just how much he and our life together mean to me.

And our little cat? Well sheesh. Nymeria slays me in such a way that I am pretty much a puddle of liquid infatuation anytime she is near.

There are just so many stupendous things coming down the pipe over the next couple of months: M starting a new job as a full-time teacher; two radio show gigs in September; an interview with BC parent magazine about my work with Big Sisters; the United Way Speakers Bureau Series of which I am a speaker (also on my work with Big Sisters); the Hot Chip (!!!) concert with Ms. A; and of course the Surrey Half-Marathon.

On the running front, I have been like Atalanta’s long-lost sister over here.

On Saturday I ran 16km in the morning, and that afternoon M and I (along with his sister and brother in-law) went for a 7.5km hike. Despite a little soreness in my left knee I was feeling great (albeit very, very hungry the next day. Actually, I think I’m still a little peaky from the day’s activities.) The next morning I went for a super slow recovery run, only to be locked out of the house upon my return, as I hadn’t brought my house key with me and during my (short!) absence my darling husband had elected to go for a sunny morning stroll to pick up the NYT crossword and delicious breakfast goods.

I took this a chance to practice my meditation techniques. And to laugh like the loon on loon tablets that I am.

Anywho, moving on, this evening after getting home from work I ran 7 km in 29 minutes.

Then I did three sets of chin-ups/pull-ups (max I could do at a time was 6 for chin-ups) and three for pull-ups, and three sets of twelve push-ups.

This makes me very happy.

In fact, it makes me feel like a boss.

And now, PHOTOS:

Mid-town meadow.


Up-town reds.

Dragon cat.

Morning Clouds.

Lynn Peak beauty.

Delicious delights.

Tell me – what makes you the boss that you are?