You must be joking

Some snaps from around the pond of late:


Begbie, a nine week old Boston terrier puppy, chewing on my coat.


The beauty cat, surveying her territory.


Rocky road cupcakes.



Cappuccino and apricot torte.

On stage at the Rio Theatre last Friday night.



Remember when I told you last month about that contest that I won, and how I had moved on to the finals being held this month?

Well, I ended up winning the finals!

They were held last Friday, and I took home first prize, and $500! Amaaaaazing!

I pretty much have the BEST FRIENDS OF LIFE, many of whom came out and cheered me on, which means the absolute world to me. I’m just happy that I could put on a good show – for not only them, but for everyone!

So buckle up kids, because I really feel like this train is leaving the station.


My Christmas wish(es)


First things first.

Look what happened this morning!


Talk about magic.

Now, on to the important stuff.

The brilliant Ms. J from Ambling and Rambling (the big sister blog to ye olde Rant and Roll) has asked me to pen my 2012 Christmas wishes, as, interestingly enough, one of her Christmas wishes.

How very meta.

So it’s got me thinking (literally, I’ve put on my pondering cap and everything) as to what is it that I want most, for not necessarily myself, but for the entire world as we head into the holidays and New Year.

So let’s just dive right in, shall we?

It’s going to be a doozy.

First, I wish that a fitting punishment be doled out to all these offenders listed below:

–          escalator standers

–          sidewalk shufflers

–          gym grunters

–          movie talkers

–          chair kickers

–          mouth breathers

–          staff meeting monologuers

–          perpetual cell phone checkers

–          non-signalling drivers

–          mansplainers


They are the absolute worst.

Don’t know a mansplainer?

They are those dudes who, because they’re a dude, like to corner women at parties, or bars, or their offices, or the bus stop, and explain to them what it’s like to be a woman, and what, as a woman, they should be doing with their life.

As a woman.


My reaction to this phenomenon is always the same:



As punishment, these individuals will have to complete a minimum sentence of twenty years of hard labour, to be served on Baffin Island, carrying rocks from one coastline to the other.

And back again.

However, in a bid to seem lenient, it will be their choice as to whether the rocks are carried North-South or East-West .

(I want to see fair, after all.)


My second wish is that anyone thinking about getting a pet next year, first looks at adoption options, before purchasing their little one.

There are so just many animals out there that need our help. And if you don’t believe me, just watch that awful Sarah McLachlan SPCA commercial.

(You know, the one that destroys viewers with all those clips of abused and sick puppies and kittens.)


I get choked up just thinking about it.

(Seriously, if your heart doesn’t break into ten thousand pieces by the 2.7 second mark of that ad, congratulations, you are officially a psychopath.)

Anyways, what I’m trying to say here is that it would make such a difference if more people looked into their local shelters before buying, because there are so many awesome little gals and guys currently available for adoption who need a warm and loving place to call home.

It was actually at our neighbourhood SPCA that we found Ms. Nymeria, and as you may have guessed, we couldn’t (and wouldn’t want to) imagine our life now without her.


(Even when she’s limbering up her killing paw.)

Phew. Where did all this rain falling on my face come from?


Third on the docket is my wish that Hot Chip returns to Vancouver ASAP, so that I can once again dance my mad face off to them in concert.


But seriously, looking back on the past three hundred and fifty-odd days, this concert was a major musical highlight (in a year already defined by many, many boughts of tonal awesomeness.)

So Alexis Taylor, et. al., – I implore you. Get your groovetastic selves back to Vancity, and STAT.

Over, and over, and over, again.

Side note: I kind of feel like I’m writing a Friday Fry-up here. But on a Wednesday. MIND BLOWN.

Finally, my Christmas wish (my real one) is for the whole world to just take a moment, and CHILL OUT.

Just stop.

Stop fighting.

Stop shooting.

Stop bombing.

Stop spending.

Stop talktalktalking.

Instead –

Start listening.

Start learning.

Start dialogue.

Start change.

Make change.

Make time.

Make beauty.

See beauty.


See love.

Be love.





Take one moment, and believe.

Because I believe our world can be better – little by little, person by person.

I believe we can make it better.

And so that is my wish.

I wish for all others to believe.

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Meanwhile, back at the ranch

So what else has been brewing on this side of the cosmic kitchen?

You mean, besides nursing my body back to its natural flesh tone (and away from its current black and blue hue)?

Well, look no further!

In the words of Bruce McCulloch – Check it out!

(Can you dig it?)

Trips to berry farms.

I did two out of three (the winery was not yet open for the year.)

Faffing around with fake doors.

Knock, knock.

I seriously love fake doors.

Acting like they are real doors? CRACKS ME RIGHT UP.

Also, this photo was taken on Sunday post-race and I am actually amazed that I managed to move my arms that far over my head.


On days that I am recovering from massive physical exertion, this is pretty much the only thing I want to eat, EVER:

Blueberry popcorn and chocolate covered pretzels.

Or perhaps this:

Confetti cake blizzard. Yes please.

If you live in the GVRD, love cake and ice cream, and haven’t tried this, I urge you to leave whatever you are currently doing, race to the closet DQ and give it a try.

It will not disappoint.

It will delight.

Adorable animals.

Baby goat!

Baby black and white goat!

It is hard to describe how cute this little guy was. He was also incredibly perturbed that his mother was on top of the bench, and that he was unable to join her.

No word of a lie,*I had him in my purse and was half way to the car when I realized my plan wasn’t the best thought out.

I don’t think Nymeria is quite ready for a roommate, especially one so vocal as Mr. Black Shoes.

(Yes. That is the name I gave him while he was briefly in my custody.**)

*This IS the biggest lie ever.

**Joke!  – please don’t phone the SPCA on me.

And of course:


I don’t know about you cats, but as soon as the warm weather actually sticks around, I plan on spending the rest of my summer sitting on one of these.

In the meantime, Mr. M and I are headed down the Oregon coast for six days of anniversary celebrating, camping, Shakespeare, hiking, eating, drinking, laughing (like loons), and just general revelry.

I cannot wait!

And what about you, dear ladies and gents?

What is coming down the pipe for you these days?

Grab a handful of blue popped corn and tell me all about it.

One odd duck

Hey Kids!  In lieu of the regular Friday Fry-up, I have a little something different planned.

Now, before I get into the crux of the matter, I feel as though I need to explain myself.

I, contrary to past (and current) posts, am not a completely deranged animal-cum-water fowl fiend.  I just happen to suffer from some kind of faulty construction (birth defect?)  in so far as I incapable of stopping myself from becoming momentarily paralyzed every time I am found in the presence of these beings.

Seriously, I almost start crying every time I read an article on polar bears.  (DAMN YOU COCA COLA!)

What can I say?

I also just really, really like ducks.

Like, a lot.

So it pretty much makes my day, but also sort-of takes my breath away and makes me tear up a bit every time I walk into the lobby of my office building and see this:

I’m trying to figure out how to 1.) get one of the geese up the elevator and into my office and 2.) jerry-rig the electronics so it will still be able to move and not, you know, blow my place sky high.

But nere you worry – I’m working on it.

Man, is it just me or is it that any way you slice the mandarin orange these days, things are looking pretty darn festive?

I don’t know if the daily increased swelling I experience in my chest is due to 1.) the holiday spirit 2.) the daily inclusion of mechanized ducks from an old Woodward’s window display 3.) angina or 4.) all of the above.

Two nights ago I was speaking with my sister on the phone and we were laughing (nay cackling) about an incident that occurred a couple of Christmas’ ago that concerned her, a Christmas-cracker hat, and a bowl of bran buds cereal.

It is definitely one of our favourites and a total go-to memory when we are in need of a good laugh-until-you-cry moment.

So do it I shall.

Cry tears of happiness.