So.
Of late, Canadian politics have been going through one heck of a WHAT THE CRAP IS THIS!? phase.
Toronto’s mayor is smoking crack, and when he’s not doing all of the drugs, he’s firing all of his staff.
Our senators are being audited up the yin yang due to their outrageous expenses.
The Prime Minister’s (now former) chief of staff cut a $90,000 personal cheque TO ONE OF SAID SENATORS, before resigning after the entire country found out about what he’d done.
SPOILER: The country wasn’t pleased.
MPs are now leaving the (ruling) Conservative Party, while others are being welcomed back – because HEY! It turns out that in the end they didn’t need to comply with that breathalyzer?
Good grief.
Oh, and yesterday it was revealed that Nigel Wright – the aforementioned former chief of staff to ol’ STEVIE HARPS (our PM) – had control of a secret fund while he was working in the Prime Minister’s Office.
This was, of course, at the same time that he cut the now infamous $90,000 “personal cheque” to disgraced Senator Mike Duffy.
Damage control. UR DOING IT RONG>
Now, the bright side of this last (bonkers) revelation, is that after it came to light, #PMOSecretFundPurchases began trending on twitter.
People immediately started coming up with the funniest (and wittiest) jokes about what this fund was actually being used for.
Now, being the HUGE Canadian political nerd that I am, I couldn’t stop myself from joining in on the fun.
So may I present to you, what just may be, my finest work to date.
Disclaimer: This probably won’t make sense to anyone who doesn’t live in Canada, or follow our politics.
To everyone else – ENJOY!
Rant and Roll 
It doesn’t make sense but I like your spunk girl. Hi.
ditto. like you said, to us nonCannux, it’s, uh, sumwhut esoteric.
but, hey! tho’ you may sleep, ah suspect YORE BRAIN is always churning!
That is true…it’s like a kitchenaid mixer up in there some days…
Hi hi! I like yours too. :)
And yes, let’s still totally try and work something out for when I’m in NY! I will keep you posted! x
Ok!! I hope we can make it happen!
Ha! – loving your post – do we all not dream about doubloons and diving boards:) Happy Weekend!
If we don’t than we totally should! x
You’re inspiring. The depth of your knowledge and how closely you follow is admirable. Cheers!
Why, why thank you! I have my mum and an early immersion in the subject matter to thank for that :)
You are running for office right????!!! I will change my citizenship for the day and come vote for you!
OF COURSE! We’ll have to get you in touch with a consulate, get all the paperwork ready in advance. :)
Well, we Americans can at least relate to the mayor smoking crack part–and in no less a town than our nation’s capital. So, while I was bereft of any hope of understanding most of your Canadian reverie, I just let my mind wander back to fond memories of Washington D.C.’s own Mayor Marion Barry.
Lol! These silly politicians. When will they ever learn? I first came across Marion Barry in Chris Rock’s stand-up. Maybe he’ll now do a bit about Rob Ford.
Nice to see you guys becoming more like us up in America’s hat. ;-)
We certainly do try! And hey! That’s one mighty fine hat. :)
Oh man, this is literally the best thing. I feel like Trudeau put in the secret fund vault. Or maybe MacDonald. They’re the only PMs that have had the type of personality that would go along with a vault of doubloons (and let’s face it, how could this fund be anything else:P). Also…that running for office thing you mentioned? Yeah…might wanna jump on that. That vote is burning a hole in my pocket:P
TOTES MacDonald! Spot on my friend. :)
And I’m working on it – your support though, I cannot tell you how much it means!
I think taking a screenshot of your Twitter feed, printing it, and framing it would make an excellent Christmas gift for a few of my Canadiana-loving family members.
IDLE NO MORE CAR BATTERIES. Bahahaha.
That would basically be the highlight of my life right there. RIGHT THERE.
Funny – yet tragically sad misuse of the people and their taxes – and unfortunately sounds just the the USA at this point in time.
You speak the truth!