All the colours of the rainbow

Hey gang.

Do you ever wake up in the morning and feel the urge to dress like Amélie?

I do.

So this past Wednesday I put together this little outfit:


I snapped this photo whilst out on a walk-around of Forever XXI’s latest megaplex, a monstrosity currently talking up a huge chunk of (incredibly valuable) downtown Vancouver real estate.

FYI – upon dressing myself this way, I had no choice but to help a blind man make his way to the metro station, all the while whispering in his ear, describing all the comings and goings of the busy streets we travelled.


So that actually didn’t happen.

Ho hum, pigs, bum.

Anywho, I only found myself at Forever XXI because I had a lunchtime hankering for some dressing room mischief, and I had arrived with the express intention of trying on absolutely bonkers clothing.

However, this plan fell by the wayside pretty quickly, as upon my entrance to the store I was greeted by a number of darling dresses, and I realized that I would much rather try on a bunch of adorable pieces than wreck myself laughing over a completely crackers floral jumpsuit.

(But only just.)

I scampered about, scooping up a few things here and there, and eventually purchased two dresses, of which the following is one:


I actually wore this dress last night at my stand-up show, along with a black and gold sweater, and brown scarf.

I like to think that I looked like the most beautiful bruise in the world.

And guess what! I’ve been booked into doing two more shows this month, so I’ll be jamming tonight AND on the twenty-fifth. Meep.

Even cooler? These are both Friday shows, which I can only surmise to be proof of the fact that I’m moving on up in the comedy world.

Oh baby.

So in honour of Friday awesomeness, let’s get this fry-on on the stove.

Colour me surprised.

So I was loitering about Sephora like the creeper that I am (okay, I was actually just using the store as a short-cut on my way back to work from lunch) when I saw this:



Thirty new shades you say?

Why, how utterly generous of you Clinique!

I mean, had I been in charge of this campaign I would probably have gone even bigger and marketed the whole thing as: “Fifty shades of beige!”

Good grief.

I mean, first, how many different variations of white can a company possibly make?

Maybe Clinique should spend some of their research and development dollars on creating a product (or, you know, products) geared toward the myriad of women out there whose skin tone doesn’t fall under the general category of “eggshell.”

Canada is pretty darn multicultural. The concept of diversity (and the fact that when diversity exists it should not be ignored) isn’t that hard to understand.

If anything, advertisers should be interested in providing a diverse, inclusive product, seeing as though it’s pretty common knowledge that the larger client basis a company appeals to, the larger their revenue.

Honestly, I totally get the creeps when confronted with this kind of crap – like when I see nylons or pantyhose (PS I HATE THIS WORD SO MUCH) labelled “flesh tone.”

Flesh tone for WHO?

I tells ya – white privilege. Coming to a store near you.


Feeling crepey.

Sunday morning, post-rain soaked run breakfast of strawberry Nutella crepes and coconut water.



Bergman chic.

I took a photo of this sweater in H&M the other day because this style will never stop making me laugh.


I believe Noel Fielding put it best, when, wearing a sweater very similar to the one above, he said that he looked like a 1970s Swedish film director.

And I will never stop thinking otherwise.

Also, if you are unacquainted with the absolute madness of Mr. Fielding, I would recommend introducing yourself as soon as possible.

Maybe start out with a little Never Mind the Buzzcocks, then make your way over to the IT Crowd, and then finish off with The Mighty Boosh.

Disclaimer: the latter show is totally nuts, so if you don’t like anything as odd as Kids in the Hall, this might not be the stuff for you. Just stick to Buzzcocks and IT Crowd.

So that’s all she wrote, you beauty cats you.

The west coast weekend weather is supposed to be off the charts brilliance-wise.

I wish you all the same, and more.

Always, always more.

Published by

Vanessa Woznow

Writer, runner, ranter, reader. I write about all things.

33 thoughts on “All the colours of the rainbow”

  1. I’m so excited for you with tonight’s big plans! Make ’em laugh, baby!!
    And the outfit is too awesome for words. Plus, that dress is a hit!
    Oh, Sephora. Did I tell you that J gifted me with their awesome makeup kit for Christmas (wish lists are great)? Ahem, but to your point, I’d be outraged if I couldn’t find my color foundation in a store. Not economically smart or ethnically sensitive on their end…
    Have a most fab and lovely weekend, Dearest! And kick butt tonight!!

    1. Way to go J! Those kits are amazing (and actually quite beautiful! They always remind me of artist palettes.) As for the other makeup, I can only surmise that these companies will eventually learn their lesson.

      And thank you – last night was very fun, but the room was so outrageously cold! I swear my feet are still defrosting. I hope your weekend is filled with magic! xx

  2. Great news about the two Friday night gigs!
    When you become a famous, world traveling comedian and come to Melbourne to do the Comedy Festival maybe you’ll let me buy you a coffee?! :)
    Well done Missy E!

  3. The IT is fantastic! Every time someone asks me a computer question my first response is automatically, “Have you tried turning it off and on again”.

  4. Ethel, first of all (have you noticed how I always start off my comments to your blog posts like this) I protest about the new 30 shades of white. Just a week ago I was disgusted with the fact that Maybelline Wrinkle Eraser (yes, it has come to this) only has two, you read correctly, two shades for darker women. My Spanish heritage has blessed me with naturally tanned skin and luckily it has golden undertones and not olive. Anyway, one “dark” shade was too light and the other was too dark. I ended up buying them both with the hopes that mixing both shades will 1) give me the right shade for my skin and 2) will provide me with double the wrinkle erasing. I’ll keep you posted.
    As for the sweater…bwhahahahahaha! That’s all I have to say about that! Finally, that little black number is a stunner! I’m sure that if you looked like a bruise, you were the most lovely bruise in the joint! ha! I love the lace! I do! As for the Amelie outfit, I wish I could pull it off. However, methinks it’s not going to happen. I would be breaking all the fashion dont’s there are to break for chubby, I mean, curvy girls! hee hee! 2013 make me fashion brave! Hugs! :)

    1. Miss Bella! You are brilliant in your hilariosity – I sincerely hope that the mixture of the two creams not only is the correct shade but also provides double the wrinkle protection. Definitely keep me posted! But in all seriousness, how awful this this crap? Yeesh!

      The sweater is totally bonkers. But strangely really comfortable to the touch.

      I hope 2013 brings you many fabulous fashion adventures! Girl those loins gal, and take the sartorial plunge! xx

  5. Love. Please go out and purchase that amelie outfit. Your stylings are truly the greatest. Shall we go for crepes soon? I think yes. Keep rocking the comedy world Ethel.

  6. yea the amilie thing weren’t half-bad. as you said, you wore it fri (last?) night. i should “go out” and, uh, perform. however: apparently after having watched the YOOTOOB you posted a coupla weeks back, you’re moving along and expanding the repertoire, etc.? how-so/some/ever, i’m more interested in what one wears when one RUNZ. yesterday, in a blizzard, (really) i was axually somewhat comfortable with EVERYTHING in the runningBagg. michelen-man, indeed.
    and the crepes after … ah …

    1. kraypss wooda been good today! (but(t) like-a-troo Slouch, i’m sippin whiskey) as dorgzeneye ran the “holey bucket” loop in ICE falling snow and about 10-deg F. twas fun! as i had the katoolies (you know what those are, right? like tire-chains for your running shoes. i was pleasantly surprized ’cause i was following RockSea’s footprints and i’d see big icy SLIDE footprints in places, … and i didn’t. i suspect you do the runstuff on ice sometimes, so you may already be a convert.

    2. I am definitely working on new material whenever I can – I like to try out new things every now and then. :) Today I went for a run (only minus 7 celcius so nowhere as cold as you I expect!) and I wore long running pants, a thermal shirt, t-shirt, toque and mitts. I also wear yaktracks to keep my feet from slipping. Have you ever used these?

  7. Those “30 shades” are really quite hilarious. To be fair to good ole’ Clinique, they *have* theincluded two chalky browns at the far right end of the spectrum. That covers it, right? Right?

    This sort of thing falls right in line with the whole band-aid situation. I assumed (whenever I put deep thought into the hue of band aids) they were just made with unbleached cotton (and, later, unbleached plastic). Imagine my surprise when I learned (at 26) that they were meant to be flesh-toned.

    1. Hah, yes! That effort should definitely about do it in terms of expanding their clientele. Yeesh. Oof, yes, bandaids are awful for this too. Or how about pencil crayons, they did it too!

  8. Laughed out loud at the bruise analogy, then laughed ever louder at the fifty shades of beige comment, then spend half an hour skipping through youtube enjoying the wonderful new discovery for me called the IT crowd. Man how I love your blog!

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