Waking up to a sleepy sun

This morning I caught the sun before it went back to bed.

Sunrise

I often have the privilege of witnessing the early dawn sky.

Unfortunately, the reason that I am this lucky is because I struggle with anxiety, and the majority of the time it manifests itself in early morning heat attacks.

Seriously, it’s like my whole body is engulfed in flames.

Often times it’s very difficult to fall back asleep, so I instead just get up, and get a really early start to things.

So this morning, instead of subjecting Marc to my sauna-inspired tossing and turning, I slipped out of bed and tiptoed downstairs.

I sat quietly on the sofa, with a cup of coffee in one hand, and watched as the sun got up, stretched, and then lay back down to sleep, in (what I can only presume to be) its bed of rest, located just behind the Fraser River.

As someone who finds this sort of thing practically impossible (falling back asleep after getting up), I was more than a little jealous. If I only I could learn its secrets!

So knowing full well that there was no way I could possibly go back to bed (even if my life depended on it!), I decided instead to lace up my runners and go out for a fast 4.5km run.

I managed to complete my route in eighteen minutes, which is a good time for the number of hills that populate the course, and it made me think that maybe (just maybe!) I will be able to run a sub-40 10km at the Fall Classic on November 19th.

The weather was just perfect – the air was cool, but not so much to make the insides of my ears burn, or make my lungs ache. A slight breeze to bring bounce to my ponytail and pink to my cheeks; fallen leaves crunchy underfoot, while the balding trees overhead presented a delirious kaleidoscope of greens, yellows, and browns.

I could smell the magic aroma of coffee and other miscellaneous breakfast delights, drifting from the different houses that mark my path to the park and back.

Sprinting the last four hundred, a lone tear slid from the corner of my left eye.

It’s funny.

I can’t for the life of me remember what I thought about while I ran.

I’m certain there must have been a few musings about Halloween, and the party Marc and I are attending tonight.

The lovely dinner we had with friends last night.

Michael Chabon’s latest novel, currently taking up real estate on my bedside table.

My stride length, and whether or not I was landing on the balls of my feet.

A series of short vignettes, starring a sleepy sunrise.

I remember when I was a little girl, I would always try and wake up as early as possible on the weekends, because Saturday and Sunday mornings were the only times my sisters and I were allowed to watch TV.

The earlier we woke, the more episodes of Inspector Gadget, or Rescue Rangers, or Duck Tales, we could watch.

I don’t know when exactly I stopped racing out of bed, and started sleeping in, but I feel as though I have now come full circle.

I am back to being that girl, that pre-sunrise child.

I just need to make sure this is due to my love of cartoons and not the heat of a worry that’s setting my alarm.

6 thoughts on “Waking up to a sleepy sun

  1. are you menopausing? that causes anxiety and sweats, myself I found I would get early morning nervousness to full blown anxiety because my blood sugar (I am not diabetic by the way) would be down how do I know with out proper tests? I eat. after I eat everything calms down and I can go back to sleep, when this happens that is a sure sign of hypoglycemia (even if blood tests are normal) the body considers it hypoglycmia releases adrenalin and walla nervousness and insomnia. the more severe the anxity the less hunger I feel (that is the nature of severe hypoglycemia you dont know it when it gets severe) and I would wonder what the heck, but soon if I manage to force feed myself or take a strong antihistamine I feel better can sleep better too. have you seen the doctor about your anxiety? my doctor gave me a special kind of antihistamine that is perfect for anxiety attacks. also a beta blocker, which I wouldnt recommend if you run, they have other stuff, I read somewhere that hypoglycmia in normal blood test people have a higher glucose set point takes higher concentrations of glucose temporarily to get it into the brain. they said this is caused by malnutrtion, not enough vitad3 high sugar intake over time, poor quality eating, dieting probably can contribute and make people malnorished because they cut fat out ot cut caloires. for me low carb diets did not address the situation it only made it worse, I tried several different types of carb restrictions, didnt help much. but I do like the picture it is pretty, my mom was like that she would always wake about 4 or 4:30 to eat something. she always drank coffee then went back to bed, don’t ask me why she could drink coffee and do that, I can drink pop with caffeine and go to sleep but pop surly contains way less caffien then coffee.

    • Not menopausing for a few years yet (at least I hope!). My heat attacks are definitely due to stress, of which I am working on!

      Thanks for all this great information. I really appreciate it, and will keep you posted!
      xx

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